Just want to inform you that I switched over to wordpress. =)
http://crystalcolin.wordpress.com/
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Saturday, May 29, 2010
so thankful...
Tonight I've been sitting in my bed thinking about life, about certain people, and about God and I have been listening to worship music. All I am able to do is cry. I am so angry and frustrated. Why does the freakin world and culture have so much power over people??! Where the heck did we go wrong and when did things get to this. Kids having sex before high school. People drinking and partying almost half the days out of a week years before they even turn 21. Swearing, drugs, gossip, eating disorders, low self-esteem.... this makes me sick to my stomach. It breaks my heart to see people that I care about, people that KNEW GOD, turn away and fall into the trap that the world has set. The devil is so freaking good at what he does. He makes all this crap look so good, feel so good. I hate it. I hate that people fall for his lies. I hate that I fall for his lies. Words can never express how grateful I am that we serve a God who is patient, a God who has more grace and forgiveness taht I can even fathom, a God that has so much love and compassion for us that nothing could ever make him not want us.
Yes, this world sucks. Our culture has become so perverted and screwed up that it's a miracle to make it through life unscathed. Let's stop using that as an excuse. Let's step into God's KINGDOM and bring it into this world that we've been placed in. WE ARE HERE ON EARTH TO SPREAD GOD'S LOVE. Step back, take a break from our culture. Turn off the TV, log out of facebook, turn off your cell phone. Read your bible and pray. Immerse yourself in God. I need to do this. I need a break from all the stress, all the sadness.
Why are you striving these days?
Why are you trying to earn grace?
Why are you crying? Let me lift up your face, just don't turn away.
Why are you looking for love? Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough?
I'll be by your side, wherever you fall.
Please don't fight these hands that are holding you.
My hands are holding you.
Look at this hands at my side. They swallowed the grave on that night.
When I drank the world's sin so I could carry you in and give you life.
I want to give you life.
I love you, I want you to know.
And I love you. I'll never let you go.
These are some of the lyrics to By Your Side by Tenth Avenue North. As I am listening to this, I literally feel as though God is talking to me. He wants us so badly, he wants us to just look at him and not turn away anymore. He wants to hold us and love us and take care of us. Life will be tough, we will always have struggles, but there is no longer any point to feel stressed, to worry, or to feel the weight of this crazy world. God can take it all and he can handle anything. Give it all to him, let him take control over our lives and guide us on the path, holding us close to his side so we no longer stray away from him.
Yes, this world sucks. Our culture has become so perverted and screwed up that it's a miracle to make it through life unscathed. Let's stop using that as an excuse. Let's step into God's KINGDOM and bring it into this world that we've been placed in. WE ARE HERE ON EARTH TO SPREAD GOD'S LOVE. Step back, take a break from our culture. Turn off the TV, log out of facebook, turn off your cell phone. Read your bible and pray. Immerse yourself in God. I need to do this. I need a break from all the stress, all the sadness.
Why are you striving these days?
Why are you trying to earn grace?
Why are you crying? Let me lift up your face, just don't turn away.
Why are you looking for love? Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough?
I'll be by your side, wherever you fall.
Please don't fight these hands that are holding you.
My hands are holding you.
Look at this hands at my side. They swallowed the grave on that night.
When I drank the world's sin so I could carry you in and give you life.
I want to give you life.
I love you, I want you to know.
And I love you. I'll never let you go.
These are some of the lyrics to By Your Side by Tenth Avenue North. As I am listening to this, I literally feel as though God is talking to me. He wants us so badly, he wants us to just look at him and not turn away anymore. He wants to hold us and love us and take care of us. Life will be tough, we will always have struggles, but there is no longer any point to feel stressed, to worry, or to feel the weight of this crazy world. God can take it all and he can handle anything. Give it all to him, let him take control over our lives and guide us on the path, holding us close to his side so we no longer stray away from him.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Freedom in Christ
How blessed are we? Christians, a group of christ-followers, are given the AMAZING opportunity to know God. Not only to know of him, but actually know him and be with him and be loved by him. When I'm at school or in a public place I look around at all the people and wonder. Do they know the Lord? What are they struggling with inside? I wonder how people get through stuff without God to help them out. I wonder how people can chose not to know God. It honestly breaks my heart to think of people not knowing our creator. It has brought me more joy and fulfillment than anything on this earth ever could. I am continually in awe of the power God has and how he blesses me.
The biggest thing that held me back from deciding to go after the Lord with everything I had was when I realized that I needed to give everything up. Partying, swearing, gossiping, boys, etc. Now, not saying I'm perfect and don't do any of those things anymore, but I'm saying that the things that people consider "fun," are not what God considers good. I wanted to remain partly in the world as well as in the kingdom of God. I realized the hard way that you can't have both. But after I decided not to be of this world, all that "fun" stuff no longer seemed fun. God has created life in such a way that we don't need those things to be happy. When we chose to utilize the freedom he's made for us, we are capable of living life the way God planned it out, which is FAR better than anything we could try to do.
So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law.
The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Galatians 5:16-23
I'd challenge you to examine yourself. Take a good look at the things you're finding fulfillment in, the things you are doing to have fun or be happy. I need to consistantly do this in order to keep my mind focused on the Lord. The path is narrow and it's easy to take a step off it, but if you keep your head up and open your eyes to the things in your life, it will be much easier. God offers us complete freedom in him. No longer to we have to be slaves to the sin of this world. The emptiness in our hearts can only be filled by God, so we need to quit trying to fill it with other things.
I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free.
Psalm 119:32
The biggest thing that held me back from deciding to go after the Lord with everything I had was when I realized that I needed to give everything up. Partying, swearing, gossiping, boys, etc. Now, not saying I'm perfect and don't do any of those things anymore, but I'm saying that the things that people consider "fun," are not what God considers good. I wanted to remain partly in the world as well as in the kingdom of God. I realized the hard way that you can't have both. But after I decided not to be of this world, all that "fun" stuff no longer seemed fun. God has created life in such a way that we don't need those things to be happy. When we chose to utilize the freedom he's made for us, we are capable of living life the way God planned it out, which is FAR better than anything we could try to do.
So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law.
The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Galatians 5:16-23
I'd challenge you to examine yourself. Take a good look at the things you're finding fulfillment in, the things you are doing to have fun or be happy. I need to consistantly do this in order to keep my mind focused on the Lord. The path is narrow and it's easy to take a step off it, but if you keep your head up and open your eyes to the things in your life, it will be much easier. God offers us complete freedom in him. No longer to we have to be slaves to the sin of this world. The emptiness in our hearts can only be filled by God, so we need to quit trying to fill it with other things.
I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free.
Psalm 119:32
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
MGMT 1003
Just a cool little story..
Today I had a Management exam and I was freaking out about it a little bit. I haven't listened in class at all this semester, and I've read 2 out of the 6 chapters that were on the exam. Last night I was going to study after FCA, but I ended up going to applebees until like 11:30pm. Well worth it, but I woke up this morning, slept through my first class, and only had time to study for an hour. Our exam had part multiple choice than 10 essay questions-8 of which we have to answer. Our teacher accidently printed copies of the answer key instead of the actual exam so as he spent the first 15 minutes of class printing the real test we had more time to study and he came back and told us that we only had to answer 7 of the essay questions. Oddly enough, there were exactly 3 essay questions that I had no idea what the answers were, and I didn't even know enough to make something up. The other questions were all things that I remembered from studying. It was a cool little thing from God and it just made my test go so smoothly. Just wanted to share =)
Today I had a Management exam and I was freaking out about it a little bit. I haven't listened in class at all this semester, and I've read 2 out of the 6 chapters that were on the exam. Last night I was going to study after FCA, but I ended up going to applebees until like 11:30pm. Well worth it, but I woke up this morning, slept through my first class, and only had time to study for an hour. Our exam had part multiple choice than 10 essay questions-8 of which we have to answer. Our teacher accidently printed copies of the answer key instead of the actual exam so as he spent the first 15 minutes of class printing the real test we had more time to study and he came back and told us that we only had to answer 7 of the essay questions. Oddly enough, there were exactly 3 essay questions that I had no idea what the answers were, and I didn't even know enough to make something up. The other questions were all things that I remembered from studying. It was a cool little thing from God and it just made my test go so smoothly. Just wanted to share =)
Saturday, March 6, 2010
jumbled thoghts
I'm finding it so hard to focus on my homework right now. I think I've been to about 10 different websites...checked my school email, checked my regular email, checked my bank accounts, read some article online, facebook, blogs, checked my class websites. I am trying to hard to avoid homework because I just have no motivation. Blahhh.. But I just realized that I haven't spent anytime with the Lord lately. This past week I have allowed myself to be busied by so many different things. I found myself looking for every possible oppotunity to avoid just sitting and being in the Lord's presence. I just realized that as I tried to avoid doing my homework, I have been putting off getting into the word this week or just spending time with God. Not that I don't want to, I have just been doing other things.
I love spending time alone, one-on-one but I feel like I need something more. I need a bible study, I need a church, I just need consistancy with something in my life. I haven't found a church that I can really plug myself into, so starting tomorrow I am going to start checking out different churches and trying to find one that I can connect with. Definitly is something important; we can only do so much on our own.
(I just read over this and I don't think there's much meaning or anything to this post, it's pretty much just brain barf...oh well)
I love spending time alone, one-on-one but I feel like I need something more. I need a bible study, I need a church, I just need consistancy with something in my life. I haven't found a church that I can really plug myself into, so starting tomorrow I am going to start checking out different churches and trying to find one that I can connect with. Definitly is something important; we can only do so much on our own.
(I just read over this and I don't think there's much meaning or anything to this post, it's pretty much just brain barf...oh well)
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
reality check
With things going on in my life lately, I have built up a lot of frustration and anger inside. I'm not like super ticked, just really upset and even hurt. Recently I've been in a situation where I literally did nothing wrong. A ton of people are really upset with me, said incredibly hurtful things, and don't care much for me anymore and it just feels like crap. I didn't do anything to deserve this. Seriously.. =/ But the thing that has just made it even worse is to realize that this is what we do to God on a continuous basis. Even though in this situation I didn't do anything, or at least didn't intentionally do anything, wrong, I have done many things wrong in other situations. God NEVER does anything wrong. Ever. Yet here we are, hurting him so much every single day. I feel really selfish because here I am moping around feeling sorry for myself when God is up there being hurt every second of every day by every person on this Earth. Gahh, I don't even want to think about how painful that would be. I thought my situation was bad... It was a reality check for me to realize that we are all just as crappy. Maybe we don't do intentionally hurtful things, or say things to bring people down like some other people, but as a whole we are all mean people, at least in the context of how we treat God. After everything that has happened this past week, I am praying that I can get rid of the anger, frustration, and hurt that I have because of people in this world and realize that I'm no better than so and so. We need to stop focusing our attention and emotions on things happening around us and pour it all into the Lord because he deserves all of our thoughts and attention. Make sense? Idk, kinda jabbered that out. Oh well.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
prayer
Do not waste your walk through life today.
Open your spiritual eyes.
Prayer is needed everywhere.
Anywhere you walk today I can and will order your steps, if you will let Me.
Pray while you're driving, while you're cooking, while you're doing laundry and running errands.
Of all the weapons in the world, prayer is your most powerful resource.
Don't let the day begin or end without letting your prayers to Me pave the way in all you do.
Wherever you go, remember that part of your royal privilege is raising your voice to heaven.
So hold on to the promises that are yours and pray!
"Pray at all times and on every occasion in the power of the holy spirit. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all christians everywhere." Ephesians 6:18
This is a page from the book His Princess: Love Letters From Your King. Just wanted to sharee =)
Open your spiritual eyes.
Prayer is needed everywhere.
Anywhere you walk today I can and will order your steps, if you will let Me.
Pray while you're driving, while you're cooking, while you're doing laundry and running errands.
Of all the weapons in the world, prayer is your most powerful resource.
Don't let the day begin or end without letting your prayers to Me pave the way in all you do.
Wherever you go, remember that part of your royal privilege is raising your voice to heaven.
So hold on to the promises that are yours and pray!
"Pray at all times and on every occasion in the power of the holy spirit. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all christians everywhere." Ephesians 6:18
This is a page from the book His Princess: Love Letters From Your King. Just wanted to sharee =)
Monday, February 15, 2010
belize
I'M GOING TO BELIZE!! This summer I've been given the amazing opportunity to go on a mission trip with a group of senior high students and some other great people. I am so excited! It was such a last minute thing and I'm not totally sure what we will be doing down there, but I do know that God will do some amazing things. I am so excited about this, and I would just ask that anyone reading this could pray that God will prepare my heart and also that I would be able to figure out all the financial aspects of it. Bahhhhh I'm so pumppped! =)
Saturday, February 13, 2010
humbled
Well, one thing that I've struggled with a lot throughout most of my life is pride. I am incredibly prideful in a few different ways. One example of my pridefulness is shown when I do something wrong. It takes a lot for me to own up to my mistakes and admit that I was wrong; I hate doing it. Another time where I'm very prideful is when I feel like I'm doing something good in my life. It's almost as thought I put myself on a pedastal and look down upon everyone who isn't doing what I'm doing. I've recently become extremely passionate for the Lord. I've gotten to a place in my life where everything is just coming together and it's been awesome! But my pride was really getting the best of me. Two days ago I was really convicted of this. I was gossiping..eww i know..and I just had it on my heart that I wasn't getting the big picture. When we're passionate about the Lord, it can only go so far without following our passions with action of compassion. Basically this means that we should do something about how we feel, we should live it out and share it, but do it in a loving way. I don't know how, but I thought I was doing this. Psshh, yeah right..I for sure wasn't doing this. I was talking about people I knew and just being so judgmental. This is really embarrassing and humbling to admit, but I honestly thought I was better than some people. I thought that since I was so passionate, other people who didn't act the way I did weren't as good as me. Pause for a minute.
How wrong is this thinking? How off were my thoughts? Wayyyy wrong and wayyy off. I was convicted of my judgment on others hardcore and I just sat back and thought about it. Yesterday before I read James chapter 4, I wrote in my journal.
"Before I read this, I just want to own up to something I've been struggling with. I am so prideful and self-righteous. I honestly think that I'm better than a lot of people. But that fact is...I'm not. Humble me Lord. I pray that you destory the pride inside of me. It disgusts me."
I opened up James and these are what I read..
verse 6 "...God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble and oppressed."
verse 8 "...Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded."
verse 10 "Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will life you up."
verse 11 "Anyone who speaks against a brother or sister or judges them speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgment on it."
It was pretty cool to see that God was just showing me that what I was doing wasn't how he wanted it. He wants us to be passionate, but also be compassionate towards others. We'll never get it right if we can't love on others the way we love and are loved by the Lord.
How wrong is this thinking? How off were my thoughts? Wayyyy wrong and wayyy off. I was convicted of my judgment on others hardcore and I just sat back and thought about it. Yesterday before I read James chapter 4, I wrote in my journal.
"Before I read this, I just want to own up to something I've been struggling with. I am so prideful and self-righteous. I honestly think that I'm better than a lot of people. But that fact is...I'm not. Humble me Lord. I pray that you destory the pride inside of me. It disgusts me."
I opened up James and these are what I read..
verse 6 "...God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble and oppressed."
verse 8 "...Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded."
verse 10 "Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will life you up."
verse 11 "Anyone who speaks against a brother or sister or judges them speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgment on it."
It was pretty cool to see that God was just showing me that what I was doing wasn't how he wanted it. He wants us to be passionate, but also be compassionate towards others. We'll never get it right if we can't love on others the way we love and are loved by the Lord.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
I'm walking through the bright white gates
Breathing in and out Your grace
All around me melodies rise
That echo with the joy inside
So I start to sing
But I can't sing loud enough
I can't sing loud enough
When I'm singing for you my God
No, I can't sing loud enough
I can't sing loud enough
When I'm singing for you my God
With a thunder roll and a brilliant light
Your glory boasts and the heavens shine
The saints and angels stand in awe
captured by the beauty of it all
So I fall to my knees
But I can't bow low enough
I can't bow low enough
At the vision of You my God
I can't bow low enough
I can't bow low enough
At the vision of You my God
I can't hold it all inside
I'm reaching for the One who brought me out of death and into life
But I can't lift my hands high enough
Life my hands high enough
When I'm reaching for You my God
I love this song. I just wanted to share how great it is. I get such a great image in my head of how beautiful our Lord is. My favorite line is "captured by the beauty of it all." Wow, that really makes me think about what heaven will be like and what it will be like when we are finally face to face with him. fj kewl; ajk cool. =)
consistency
Well, February has been a pretty busy month already, and from the looks of my calendar...it isn't going to slow down. I have training this weekend for my mission trip to Belize on Friday and all day Saturday. I work all day on Valentine's Day =/. Major studying all next week. FCA retreat the weekend after next (SO PUMPED). THREE midterm exams the week after the retreat. Gross. Then it's my birthday weekend after that.
I honestly feel pretty overwhelmed with the stuff I have going on, but I am real excited about most of the stuff coming up in my life. Although it can get a little stressful being busy, I still like it. The only thing that I've been struggling with this week is making time for the Lord. Even though I've been on this amazing spiritual high these past few months, I've realized how important it is for my faith to continuously be seeking out the Lord and devoting my time-my life even-to him every single day. It isn't something that I can do just once and be set after that. Reading my bible on Monday will definitly not get me through the week. Praise gathering on Wednesday doesn't even get me through Thursday sometimes. For my faith, I need it every day. And it isn't even so much about needing it, but I want it. I want to know more about who God is, I want to learn things about myself and seek out what God's plan is for my life so that I can follow that. I'm a super nerd when it comes to school.. I really like it. And this is going to sound realllly stupid but please don't judge.. I honestly love to learn, and what could be better than learning about our Lord. There's so much that not only do we not know, but things that we can't even fathom. THAT'S AMAZING TO ME!!
I don't know what else to write.. I just got super tired all of a sudden. Goodnight.
p.s. Megan helped me come up with the amazing title of this blog, in case anyone was wondering. hahah =)
I honestly feel pretty overwhelmed with the stuff I have going on, but I am real excited about most of the stuff coming up in my life. Although it can get a little stressful being busy, I still like it. The only thing that I've been struggling with this week is making time for the Lord. Even though I've been on this amazing spiritual high these past few months, I've realized how important it is for my faith to continuously be seeking out the Lord and devoting my time-my life even-to him every single day. It isn't something that I can do just once and be set after that. Reading my bible on Monday will definitly not get me through the week. Praise gathering on Wednesday doesn't even get me through Thursday sometimes. For my faith, I need it every day. And it isn't even so much about needing it, but I want it. I want to know more about who God is, I want to learn things about myself and seek out what God's plan is for my life so that I can follow that. I'm a super nerd when it comes to school.. I really like it. And this is going to sound realllly stupid but please don't judge.. I honestly love to learn, and what could be better than learning about our Lord. There's so much that not only do we not know, but things that we can't even fathom. THAT'S AMAZING TO ME!!
I don't know what else to write.. I just got super tired all of a sudden. Goodnight.
p.s. Megan helped me come up with the amazing title of this blog, in case anyone was wondering. hahah =)
Thursday, February 4, 2010
I gave up facebook last night until summer, with a potential week of reactivating it during spring break. As embarrassing as this is, I find myself going to my former book mark at the top of my internet browser and being extremely disappointed when I remember that it isn't there.
I'm in class right now and the guy in front of me is on facebook... uggghhhhhhh.
No more cafe world, no more farmville, no more statuses, no more funny comments, no more music videos, and no more facebook chat. The worst part about it all is not being able to message people. My groups of friends and I all have a giant message that has been going on since we started planning stuff for the weekend we all came home for our high school's homecoming. Ever since then, we message each other almost daily about updates in our lives and just share funny stories. It sucks that I won't be able to read that anymore for a while.
The good part about giving up facebook, however, outweighs the things that I have to give up. Today I have done more homework than I have all semester. As most people are, I'm a huge creep and I find that I gossip wayy more because of things I read or see on facebook, so that sin that I struggle with will be much easier now. Also, I have never paid so much attention in class.
I'm hoping that this helps me academically the most. =/Here's to hoping...haha
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
moment of weakness
Last night I was thinking about a ton of stuff and, to be completely honest, I was bawling. I had thought that everything in my life was going pretty good. I was finally full-fledged following (whoa lots of f's) the Lord and doing his will. But yesterday I had one thing go wrong, and the rest of my day just went downhill. After I calmed down and got a hold of myself, I thought about what had just happened. Everything was and is going great in my life, but in my moment of weakness, I was attacked. So to jump right in to the point of this blog...
The devil uses our moments of weakness to his advantage. I always find that when I'm frustrated about one small thing or I'm just struggling and having a bad day, he attacks me with so much more. Every person has those certain things that they always struggle with. For me, feeling inadequate has been huge. Along with probably 90% of other girls, I sometimes feel like I'm not pretty enough, or skinny enough, or good enough blah blah blah. You get the picture. Anyways, the devil uses my moments of frustration to really attack me with these feelings of worthlessness. On a normal day, I don't really feel anything negative about myself. I'm happy with who I am and who God has created me to be, but oh man... when I'm in that negative mood.. the devil realllly knows how to get to me. That's what made me just lose it last night. Everything going on in my life was magnified by about 4982 and it almost felt like the world was endinng and I had no way to solve my "problems."
The point I'm trying to make is that this is crap. It's so stupid that the devil can take advantage of us like this. It's frustrating that he is SOO good at what he does. And of course we can't always expect him, but as Christians we have our wonderful Savior on our side. We can prepare ourselves and build our faiths up so that when we are faced with difficulties, we are ready to stand against the devil with the Lord with us and succeed. The question isn't about if we're going to face trials in our lives, that's pretty much a given, but it's about when we will face trials. And the difference in those who can conquer and grow in their faiths through persecution and those who give up lies in how much we prepare ourselves and how ready we are to face what the devil has to throw at us. We need to always be in prayer, always be seeking to know God more, always be trying to better ourselves. It's so important. It's not just some random opportunity that God has given us just for fun, he has given us the chance to live a christ-like life that will lead to only good things. Trust in that.
The devil uses our moments of weakness to his advantage. I always find that when I'm frustrated about one small thing or I'm just struggling and having a bad day, he attacks me with so much more. Every person has those certain things that they always struggle with. For me, feeling inadequate has been huge. Along with probably 90% of other girls, I sometimes feel like I'm not pretty enough, or skinny enough, or good enough blah blah blah. You get the picture. Anyways, the devil uses my moments of frustration to really attack me with these feelings of worthlessness. On a normal day, I don't really feel anything negative about myself. I'm happy with who I am and who God has created me to be, but oh man... when I'm in that negative mood.. the devil realllly knows how to get to me. That's what made me just lose it last night. Everything going on in my life was magnified by about 4982 and it almost felt like the world was endinng and I had no way to solve my "problems."
The point I'm trying to make is that this is crap. It's so stupid that the devil can take advantage of us like this. It's frustrating that he is SOO good at what he does. And of course we can't always expect him, but as Christians we have our wonderful Savior on our side. We can prepare ourselves and build our faiths up so that when we are faced with difficulties, we are ready to stand against the devil with the Lord with us and succeed. The question isn't about if we're going to face trials in our lives, that's pretty much a given, but it's about when we will face trials. And the difference in those who can conquer and grow in their faiths through persecution and those who give up lies in how much we prepare ourselves and how ready we are to face what the devil has to throw at us. We need to always be in prayer, always be seeking to know God more, always be trying to better ourselves. It's so important. It's not just some random opportunity that God has given us just for fun, he has given us the chance to live a christ-like life that will lead to only good things. Trust in that.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
faith and work
Tonight I was reading James chapter 2 and it was all about faith and works. This is something that I feel is really hard to share with people because it is something that really convicts people, myself included. Almost everyone knows that salvation can be found by faith alone-but there is a depth to this I think. Yeah, we just need to have faith in order to be saved, but we need to have a true faith. True faith, in my opinion, is genuine belief in who God is, what Jesus did for us, and what the bible says. God calls us to be Christ-like. We have been given a life on earth in order to glorify God. Even though we will fall short, we can still do everything in our power to please the Lord and give back what he deserves.
"You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that-and shudder." James 2:19
This verse makes a good point. We can believe in God all day. We can believe in what he can do and how amazing he is, but what good is believing if we don't do anything about it? It's honestly no good. It's a dead faith. Here is an excerpt from a book called Crazy Love by Francis Chan...
Lukewarm people don ot live by faith; their lives are structured so they never have to. They don't have to trust God if something unexpected happens-they have their savings accoun. They don't need God to help them out-they have their retirement plan in place. They don't genuinely seek out what life God would have them live-they have life figured out and mapped out. They don't depend on God on a daily basis-their refrigerators are full, and for the most part, they are in good health. The truth is, their lives wouldn't look much different if they suddenly stopped believing in God...
Jesus asks for everything. But we try to give Him less. Jesus said, "Salt is good, but if it loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is fit neither for the soil nor for hte manure pile; it is thrown out." Luke 14:34-35
Jesus isn't making a cute little analogy here. He is addressing those who aren't willing to give everything, who won't follow hHim all the way. He is saying that lukewarm, halfhearted following is USELESS, that it sickens our souls.
Wow. This is so powerful! It's so blatanly obvious that it is pointless to have a faith and not do anything about it. Our Lord not only deserves our best, but he demands it. It sounds weird to say, but I don't think he wants a faith unless it is genuine. Genuine is the operative word here. From true faith, works flow. We don't have to do things for God to love us; Jesus came and died so that we didn't have to, but if we have true faith and if we truly desire to be Christ-like, we will do things that God would want from us. We will live out our faiths and not just sit in one place simply believing in God. The demons believe in God too, they just don't obey him. I know I'm better than that, and I will do something about it.
"You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that-and shudder." James 2:19
This verse makes a good point. We can believe in God all day. We can believe in what he can do and how amazing he is, but what good is believing if we don't do anything about it? It's honestly no good. It's a dead faith. Here is an excerpt from a book called Crazy Love by Francis Chan...
Lukewarm people don ot live by faith; their lives are structured so they never have to. They don't have to trust God if something unexpected happens-they have their savings accoun. They don't need God to help them out-they have their retirement plan in place. They don't genuinely seek out what life God would have them live-they have life figured out and mapped out. They don't depend on God on a daily basis-their refrigerators are full, and for the most part, they are in good health. The truth is, their lives wouldn't look much different if they suddenly stopped believing in God...
Jesus asks for everything. But we try to give Him less. Jesus said, "Salt is good, but if it loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is fit neither for the soil nor for hte manure pile; it is thrown out." Luke 14:34-35
Jesus isn't making a cute little analogy here. He is addressing those who aren't willing to give everything, who won't follow hHim all the way. He is saying that lukewarm, halfhearted following is USELESS, that it sickens our souls.
Wow. This is so powerful! It's so blatanly obvious that it is pointless to have a faith and not do anything about it. Our Lord not only deserves our best, but he demands it. It sounds weird to say, but I don't think he wants a faith unless it is genuine. Genuine is the operative word here. From true faith, works flow. We don't have to do things for God to love us; Jesus came and died so that we didn't have to, but if we have true faith and if we truly desire to be Christ-like, we will do things that God would want from us. We will live out our faiths and not just sit in one place simply believing in God. The demons believe in God too, they just don't obey him. I know I'm better than that, and I will do something about it.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
it's all about love.
This past week has been an interesting week. There have been a LOT of ups and downs. I've been very close to God and I have really been reflecting on what his will is for me, and I've been trying to figure out the best way to follow that. I can't decide what I should change in my life, I'm not sure what things I need to work on the most, and I haven't figured out what would be best for me right now. Last night as I was praying, however, I realized that it doesn't matter and that we don't need to know exactly what to do in our lives. The only thing we need to do is love and the rest will fall into place. When I say we need to love, I don't mean we need to love our friends, our family, other people, etc.-at least not first. I mean that we need to truly and honestly love the Lord, our creator.
Since becoming a Christian, I always knew that we have to love God. Heck, even non christians know that, but last night I came to realize that it's not just about knowing that we need to love our God, but we need to do it. I feel like so many people say that they're christians and so many people say they love God, but do they really? I don't even know if I can truthfully say that I loved God before, at least not in the way that he deserves.
Imagine this.
Let's say you're dating someone and it's pretty serious. You love your significant other, and they love you back. You care about this person so much, and almost nothing could change that. Now think about the idea of them loving someone else more than they love you. You still care about them and are showing them the love like before, but they aren't returning the love anymore and they've began to show it to someone else. I'm not sure if I wrote that in a way to understand, but hopefully I did, but regardless, think about how much that would hurt you. Imagine the feeling you would get if someone you loved showed someone else the love that you deserve from them. THAT'S HOW GOD FEELS ABOUT US!! We break his heart so many times, it's honestly so embarrassing and pathetic. I'm ashamed of the fact that I have shown more love to people and things in this world than I have to God. He deserves ALL of our love, not just the leftovers that we continually give him.
So I challenge you to make that your goal. Love God above all else. If you love him and give him everything he deserves, the rest will fall into place. He will bless your life in ways that you can't even imagine. Who wouldn't want that?
Since becoming a Christian, I always knew that we have to love God. Heck, even non christians know that, but last night I came to realize that it's not just about knowing that we need to love our God, but we need to do it. I feel like so many people say that they're christians and so many people say they love God, but do they really? I don't even know if I can truthfully say that I loved God before, at least not in the way that he deserves.
Imagine this.
Let's say you're dating someone and it's pretty serious. You love your significant other, and they love you back. You care about this person so much, and almost nothing could change that. Now think about the idea of them loving someone else more than they love you. You still care about them and are showing them the love like before, but they aren't returning the love anymore and they've began to show it to someone else. I'm not sure if I wrote that in a way to understand, but hopefully I did, but regardless, think about how much that would hurt you. Imagine the feeling you would get if someone you loved showed someone else the love that you deserve from them. THAT'S HOW GOD FEELS ABOUT US!! We break his heart so many times, it's honestly so embarrassing and pathetic. I'm ashamed of the fact that I have shown more love to people and things in this world than I have to God. He deserves ALL of our love, not just the leftovers that we continually give him.
So I challenge you to make that your goal. Love God above all else. If you love him and give him everything he deserves, the rest will fall into place. He will bless your life in ways that you can't even imagine. Who wouldn't want that?
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Anything and Everything
Well, hopefully after this post I don't continue my 3 in the morning habit.. haha.
So today was quite the day to say the least. This past month as I read my bible and prayed one of the biggest things that has come up is the idea of "all or nothing" with regards to our faiths. I've realized that in order to truly seek God, to truly experience a 'real' faith, I have to give Him my all or give him nothing at all. It seems simple, and I thought I understood it before but I didn't. It's something that, in my opinion, is the only way to feel God in the way that we are created to feel him and be with him. I've been praying and journaling a ton recently. I keep saying/writing "God, I'm yours. Do what you want with me, use me in any way you want, let me do your will while I'm here on earth." I just want to follow God's plans. I want to do anything and everything he calls me to do.
I think God has a sense of humor. Well.. I know he does. Ask and you shall receive. Today I was faced with one of the toughest decisions in my life so far. I could go with choice A and do what I wanted, I could be selfish and hang on to what I wanted for myself or else I could choose choice B and do what God has put on my heart today. I took a huge leap of faith and went with choice B. I stuck to what I've been praying and asking for. It's funny how when we truly give everything up to God and when we finally realize what life is all about, change happens almost immediately. I thought that now that I've finally gone to the next level with my faith it would take a while to feel different, it would be a while before I started noticing significant changes in my life. Nope. I asked, and I received. Choosing the choice opposite my selfish desires sucks to be completely honest. And I'll admit...I've cried a lot today. But I'm oddly calm and at peace right now, and I would even go as far as to say I'm excited. God has so much in store for my life, and everyone else's for that matter, and the things he has planned for us are far better than anything we could ever think up ourselves.
So today I will be reminding myself of how amazing God is, how perfect he is.
"Everything I once held dear, I count it all as lost... Rid me of myself, I belong to you." I feel like these lines from the song Lead Me to the Cross really hit it on the spot. Nothing matters in this world. Not one thing except for the Lord. He is our creator, our sustainer, our everything. Nothing else matters. I will praise him and do anything and everything.
So today was quite the day to say the least. This past month as I read my bible and prayed one of the biggest things that has come up is the idea of "all or nothing" with regards to our faiths. I've realized that in order to truly seek God, to truly experience a 'real' faith, I have to give Him my all or give him nothing at all. It seems simple, and I thought I understood it before but I didn't. It's something that, in my opinion, is the only way to feel God in the way that we are created to feel him and be with him. I've been praying and journaling a ton recently. I keep saying/writing "God, I'm yours. Do what you want with me, use me in any way you want, let me do your will while I'm here on earth." I just want to follow God's plans. I want to do anything and everything he calls me to do.
I think God has a sense of humor. Well.. I know he does. Ask and you shall receive. Today I was faced with one of the toughest decisions in my life so far. I could go with choice A and do what I wanted, I could be selfish and hang on to what I wanted for myself or else I could choose choice B and do what God has put on my heart today. I took a huge leap of faith and went with choice B. I stuck to what I've been praying and asking for. It's funny how when we truly give everything up to God and when we finally realize what life is all about, change happens almost immediately. I thought that now that I've finally gone to the next level with my faith it would take a while to feel different, it would be a while before I started noticing significant changes in my life. Nope. I asked, and I received. Choosing the choice opposite my selfish desires sucks to be completely honest. And I'll admit...I've cried a lot today. But I'm oddly calm and at peace right now, and I would even go as far as to say I'm excited. God has so much in store for my life, and everyone else's for that matter, and the things he has planned for us are far better than anything we could ever think up ourselves.
So today I will be reminding myself of how amazing God is, how perfect he is.
"Everything I once held dear, I count it all as lost... Rid me of myself, I belong to you." I feel like these lines from the song Lead Me to the Cross really hit it on the spot. Nothing matters in this world. Not one thing except for the Lord. He is our creator, our sustainer, our everything. Nothing else matters. I will praise him and do anything and everything.
Monday, January 25, 2010
the first one.
I have tried starting this first post about 7 times already, no joke. I've typed a good 2 paragraphs each time and just deleted it. I honestly have no idea what to write on here or how much to write. Do I give an introduction or summary of who I am and my life or should I just start writing about stuff? Hmmm.... I'm gonna go with a little background to who I am.
Welp, I'm 18 years old (19 in one month and two days) and I go to the University of Minnesota. I'm one of those nerdy students who actually likes school. I love to read books and have intelligent conversations. I am in love with our Lord, Jesus Christ. Every day I am honestly in awe of who he is, what he can do, and what he has done in my life and in the lives of those around me. Despite what many people think college does to a person's faith, college has helped me grow more in my faith during this past semester than I have my whole life leading up to this fall. Weird, I know.. but really cool.
I wasn't raised in a Christian home and I think I can remember going to church maybe twice before junior high/high school, but my family was very loving and they raised me to have good morals and such. In junior high I made friends that were all christians and that's when I started learning about christianity. High school was good for me, I had the same great friends and I played sports, got good grades, dated people. I was pretty much your typical high school girl, but I never really devoted much of my time or my life to God. I honestly didn't even know very much about who God was or even how he felt about me. I fell into a lot of the temptations that most kids fall into, and senior year I started to get even more into the whole party scene.
God placed someone in my life after winter break, and ever since then my life has never been the same. I've finally given my life over to the Lord and made the decision to live for Him, and not for this world. It's been the most freeing experience ever, and it has brought me SOOO much joy. Words honestly can't describe it. =) So right now, I have a new passion for Christ and everyday I learn more about Him and get even more excited about who he is. I love it!
I started up this blog because I'm learning so much and I just want to share it. I journal a lot, but my hand gets pretty tired writing everything I have to say, so I figured it might just be easier to type it out, haha. So that's pretty much about me. Wow, I think I might actually post this and not delete it. Success!
Welp, I'm 18 years old (19 in one month and two days) and I go to the University of Minnesota. I'm one of those nerdy students who actually likes school. I love to read books and have intelligent conversations. I am in love with our Lord, Jesus Christ. Every day I am honestly in awe of who he is, what he can do, and what he has done in my life and in the lives of those around me. Despite what many people think college does to a person's faith, college has helped me grow more in my faith during this past semester than I have my whole life leading up to this fall. Weird, I know.. but really cool.
I wasn't raised in a Christian home and I think I can remember going to church maybe twice before junior high/high school, but my family was very loving and they raised me to have good morals and such. In junior high I made friends that were all christians and that's when I started learning about christianity. High school was good for me, I had the same great friends and I played sports, got good grades, dated people. I was pretty much your typical high school girl, but I never really devoted much of my time or my life to God. I honestly didn't even know very much about who God was or even how he felt about me. I fell into a lot of the temptations that most kids fall into, and senior year I started to get even more into the whole party scene.
God placed someone in my life after winter break, and ever since then my life has never been the same. I've finally given my life over to the Lord and made the decision to live for Him, and not for this world. It's been the most freeing experience ever, and it has brought me SOOO much joy. Words honestly can't describe it. =) So right now, I have a new passion for Christ and everyday I learn more about Him and get even more excited about who he is. I love it!
I started up this blog because I'm learning so much and I just want to share it. I journal a lot, but my hand gets pretty tired writing everything I have to say, so I figured it might just be easier to type it out, haha. So that's pretty much about me. Wow, I think I might actually post this and not delete it. Success!
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